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| All Great Things Must Come to An End |
| 04.15.04 (1:23 pm) [edit] |
"The end is never as satisfying as the journey. To have achieved everything but to have done so without integrity and excitement is to have achieved nothing. "
Well I think this journal has served its purpose for the while I had it.. I dont know if I'll write in it anymore, theres just so much I have to get going...
Thats all I can say for now.. Im still teetering with the thought.
Til then
Aims.
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9 Comments
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| The #1 Fool of April |
| 04.01.04 (10:56 pm) [edit] |
"Memory is the scribe of the soul. "
Today was also April 1st. That officially marks a year since my ex bf traveled from Oregon to come meet me for the first time.. yes folks, I had an online relationship. To compare it to every other relationship Ive ever had it was the most magical, I must honestly admit.I thought today was going to be a very hard day and Im still here..If the phone rang again and I saw his number on my caller ID again I wouldnt answer it, couldnt answer it, wont answer it. Hes probably given up already.
..That kind of love is the kind that petrifies me..
For about a month and a half now, Ive found a sense of tranquility I havent had in quite some time, its been months, and the one person I have to sincerely thank is my friend Sean for being there for me and helping me find a moment to cope with it and smoothen it out through meditation.. I even wrote a poem and a couple of words down. Which I havent done in like forever..
Like I posted earlier today, I didnt go to work, I slept in, and relaxed and shot the shit around the house and started organizing things for my trip which I leave on this Wednesday! Cant wait..
Talked to Todd for a while and bitched him out for his misbehavior on the phone last night while having his roomate call me while I was, well lets say ummm "busy" :wink: .
*Ahem*
Then my phone rang, got in the shower and got dressed and drove over to "friends" house, where we proceeded to go to Target and get the suitcase set I was eyeing for a week..After that I forced him to go to Bed Bath and Beyond to get some things for his guest bathroom which is totally empty..We got some really cool stuff for his bathroom, I might be a girl, but I have good taste, not girly taste, and I know what kind of style guys usually like..
but now I know Im tottally gonna hear it from my friends when they use his bathroom and see the change and ask him where he got that stuff.. I can almost hear them now "Oh so now your helping him decorate"..lol..
Cant wait :roll: ....
Not.
Anyways, then afterwards we went to [url=http://www.applebees.com/]Applebees[/url] and I
made him try my fav desert there...White Chocolate and Walnut Blondie!! Awesome!
Then we drove back to his place and put the stuff in the bathroom, hey its getting there..lol..I have a before pic, when its done I'll post an after pic...I'll be the next fab chic, cept I'll be one heterosxual girl helping every single guy out there one day at a time..
I'll keep ya posted when Im in your town, I promise..
So after a hard days work I kept it PG-13 with him cause he goes to work at 4:30 am and hes not getting any sleep if Im there til late, keeping him awake..and lately weve been up kinda late..So I came home, and here I am..writing to all of ya'll..
:lol:
Goodnight.
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7 Comments
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| Lost In Translation.. |
| 04.01.04 (1:16 pm) [edit] |
"I'm not confused, I'm just well mixed. "
We are almost there ladies and gents, to the weekend, Im counting down.. lol..
I think went T-Blog went down the other day it ran off the people that had this blog botted...sorry about that inconvenience..
Well I didnt feel like going to work today so here I am in bloggy land, looking for things to read..Have alot of things to do, but I'll check in on my friends first!
Oh and as the week had gone by..things have been getting stranger and stranger between me and this guy.. Ever been in a relationship where you just didnt know were things were going? Im just going along with the flow, the ride, whatever this is.. Its like Ive said a thousand times before.. I dont want to be in any kind of relationship, I just cant be.. My moms sick and I plan on leaving this wretched city and I didnt want to get involved with anyone or hurt anyone.
Yet I still do.
Using someone to ease my humanly need to be close to someone is not something I want to do. Dont get me wrong, I like this guy, he has every single quality any normal woman would want. Its just me I guess.
The thing is, is that I know he wants to be with me, and in more ways than just one. I can see it in the way he looks at me, how he talks to me, how he touches me. In the end, maybe its me whos running cause of fear.
My current mental state is outta state outta mind..so I dont trust my own feelings about anyone or anything.. and to bind myself to the wonderful person he is and burn him in the process is something I dont want to be held accountable for... I need all the help I can get!
Cupids the one to blame....
Well thats it for now, I'll probably add another ramble later..Ya'll come back now ya hear?
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3 Comments
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